I finally get to OT 3 and they give me the secret materials, which I've been hearing about all this time. They're hand written by Hubbard. You'd have to keep them in a locked briefcase, be very cautious because they would always say if this gets out it's dangerous to people. It can actually do them harm if they are not adequately prepared. And I read it and it doesn't make any sense... I think, I remember for one fleeting second thinking well maybe it's an insanity test. Maybe if we believe this they kick you out. You know? Maybe you're insane! That of course is not the case. They talk about, you know, the fact that the earth was created, that such and such of trillions of years ago and this guy, who's this space guy... and put them in volcanoes and then blow them up with A-bombs... And we have these lost souls all over us and we have to get rid of them. And I'm going what the fuck are you talking about? I mean, I'm down for the self-help stuff. I'm down for, ok, I can be clear, I can, you know, I can get rid of those, the negative emotions, but what the fuck is this?